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This period represents a full decade since the word “ghosting” entered the common lexicon. Back then, the idea that someone could abruptly cease contact with a romantic interest without a word seemed like the height of indignity. Our innocence was charming. In the decade since, seeking a mate has only become more confounding – an oftentimes unsuccessful endeavor in embarrassment that is increasingly pigeonholed by online lingo.

Zoomers, a generation who matured during a loneliness epidemic, a male identity reckoning, and a concerted attack on the freedoms of females and the LGBTQ+ community, faces a significantly more chaotic environment than their Gen Y predecessors could ever imagine. And so their dating glossary has grown more extensive and more bizarre, with phrases like “Ogre-ing” and “vine swinging” straining the boundaries of your sanity.

What follows is a comprehensive guide to the terms gen Z is using to discuss love, sex and the search of both. To echo one of the recent most popular online sayings, by the conclusion of this list you’ll long to get back to God’s country – because where that is, it is free from “wokefishing”.

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The Letter A

Authenticity – According to gen Z, romance's ultimate goal is showing up as your true, raw self. Best wishes with that!

B

Bird theory – A online phenomenon connected to a methodology developed by relationship scientists, in which you point out something insignificant – for example, “I saw a bird today” – and observe whether your date's reaction is engaged or brushed off. If they show no desire to hear more about the bird, you two are not compatible.

Independent partner – Zoomers' answer to the “manic pixie dream girl” archetype of the early 2000s – but instead of having short fringe, liking The Smiths and eschewing commitment, the mysterious partner puts herself first while oozing enigma and self-sufficiency. (She may yet have that fringe.)

The Letter C

Support test – This signifies going for someone who aids you without being asked. If you entered a room, they would pull up a chair for you to sit down.

Task-based bonding – A date where two people connect while doing chores, such as walking the dog or food shopping. In other words, how broke people in their 20s do budget-friendly dating in a post-cheap-date world.

Melting down – Melting down when you feel swamped by life. You can spiral over a crush or breakup, dumping all of your unreciprocated emotions.

D

Dink – Two incomes, no children. Once a symbol of 1980s yuppie excess, it refers to couples who forgo having children to prioritize their own well-being. Or because they cannot afford to become parents.

E

Open communication – The opposite of being guarded: embracing dialogue, transparency and vulnerability.

F

Signals

• Danger signals – Behavioral traits indicating a potential partner is not right. Such as calling their exes crazy, subpar tipping habits, a fondness for controversial director films, a new DJ career …
• Good indicators – These traits affirm your choice to date a partner. For instance checking in to make sure you got home safely after a date, minimal screen time, owning a bed frame …
• Odd but harmless traits – These usually describe specific, largely benign quirks. Examples include being an enthusiastic ornithologist, still keeping a biro in their wallet, paying rent in physical money …

Shared obsession pairing – When you meet someone who’s just as obsessive about documentaries about the second world war or DVD collecting or art or anything it may be, as you. Or, on the flip side, finding someone who loathes the same stuff or individuals that you do (nothing builds closeness faster than having a common enemy).

The Letter G

Geese – A musical group your gen Z boyfriend listens to.

Zombie-ing – Someone who pops back into your life after a length of disappearing.

Eager-to-please partner – Someone who is friendly, eager to please and devoted. The uncommon partner who is liked by all of his partner’s friends, and a mysterious partner's foil.

Prolonged session enthusiasts – A mostly online subculture of men so fixated with masturbation that they attempt extended sessions, intentionally delaying orgasm so they can persist as long as possible.

The Letter H

Pessimistic straight dating – A phenomenon describing many women’s increasing pessimism toward heterosexual relationships. It will come as little surprise to anyone who read the previous entry.

High-value woman – An ideal promoted by manosphere figures: a woman who is sexually desirable, nurturing and happily domestic, who seemingly has no goals of her own aside from pleasing her man partner. Maybe now you’re beginning to grasp the whole “pessimism” thing better?

The Letter I

Ick factors – Random and often mundane repulsions that immediately shut down any feelings of attraction.

“He would if he cared" – Something to remember after you watch someone else receive an incredibly romantic act.

J

Professions – These have not been this important in the dating scene since the greed-is-good era. For some women, a “man in finance” is the ideal partner: a preppy, conservative-leaning guy who will be a provider (there’s a hit TikTok song on the topic). Meanwhile the anti-capitalist crowd prefer partners in professions they see as being staffed by the more emotionally available among us: healthcare workers, educators or counselors.

The Letter K

Locking lips – This year, researchers learned that kissing has been around for 16 million years. But the days of locking lips may be waning since some Zoomers desire fewer intimate scenes in movies, as they are having reduced intimacy themselves and do not find cinematic romance believable.

Light catfishing – Mild deception. Or, not exactly lying about who you are, but maybe using older (better) photos of yourself on a online profile, or making your job sound more impressive than it is. Also known as {